Visiter Number

Saturday, 30 April 2011

Royal Festivities

(a day late buut..) Happy Royal Wedding Day! 

So my wedding festivities began with my guurl Becki's eighteenth. Tiaras all round, mine was the best though, it flashed. And came with matching clip on earrings. So after finishing chemo on Thursday at five, we rushed home, got ready, ate and hopped out the door to get 'ridiculously L' with Becki and co. After a wonderful night, with many Royal messes, (I shall not name and shame, but you know who you are) everyone headed out in their horse-ridden carriages ( cabs) to Po Na Naaaa. (unfortunately this was no option for me as 1) i cannot drink and 2) there's too many people and therefore it's too likely I'll catch an infection. BLEH.) So we stayed behind to help tidy up for a bit and headed home ourselves. So I must say, it was a spectacular beginning to the Royal weekend.

So, of course back to usual life, up and in hospital for chemo at 11.30,  greeted at the ward door by a nurse in a fascinator, then to find all the nurses were wearing fascinators or tiaras, was very disappointed at how underdressed I was and by the fact I didn't bring my flashing tara. And instead of the beds in daycare, they set up rows of seating in front of the TV with a tea party table underneath. So there we sat and witnessed the beautifully dressed Kate Middleton wed to the uglier heir William. Unfortunate, huh? (Harry and my wedding will be on it's way, don't you worry) Finally, I got moved to TCT after two hours of chemo-less, pointless waiting, we got some peace an continued to watch the remains of the wedding. It may not have been the most perfect day, as whilst everyone was dressed up at Royal Wedding parties, I was in comfies and a hoodie in bed, but still, one to remember of course! It also gave my brother the house to himself to do goodness knows what but certainly make a royal mess. So of course, in every newspaper today the front page has the picture of the kiss. Full on prince and princess kiss, one you dream of when you're a little girl. way to make the rest us feel bad.

Anyway, back to real life. I then watched Wallace and Gromit and part of Shrek. Standard Friday night in the Gibson world. It's unreal the amount of hidden sexual innuendo's in kids's films. When we were young and innocent watching them, our parent's must have been laughing to themselves, whilst we have no idea why and what at. So cheeky! They're hidden everywhere and in every Disney/Pixar etc film! So, continuing my THRILLING evening, I then had the remains of my brother's and his friends' BBQ for dinner whilst a friend of mine had a three course meal, with three menu choices, proper restaurant-esque. I was extremely jealous to say the very least! Lying in bed wishing it was the night before, or wishing I was out at some festive Wedding street party, or something. But no, standard night in with food and movies, drowning my sorrows. (hahahahahah)

And this pretty much brings me to now, lying in bed-surprise surprise- hooked up to my drip, with that annoying clicking sound. Which has now got that stupid Harry Potter puppet pals show stuck in my head. You know the one..'Snape Snape Severous Snape, DUMBLEDOOR, Ron Ron Ron Weasley, Hermione, Harrypotter Harrypotter.. Yes, you know where I'm going with this, it's driving me insane. Lying, listening to this clicking, ticking and flowing machine attached to tubes inside me whilst the sun blares through the windows and makes the room unbearably hot (cue for sympathy) Without a word of a lie i would 100% rather be outside revising for exams with my iPod. But firstly, I'm only sitting one exam, secondly, I hate revising and thirdly, in my current condition, going outside in any non-rain/sleet/snow weathering requires me to wear factor fifty and a sunhat, most likely sitting in shade or under an umbrella. Just another one of my endless precautions to keep myself as healthy and well as humanely possible. So basically I feel very much like an inmate at the state prison. Although the hospital is a lot more welcoming and comforting, probably with better food, nicer people, less violence. But you catch my drift, yeah ? (awkward how I just typed 'drip' instead of 'drift' See, chemo brainwashes you, all you think about is your various drugs and hospital-related subjects.) Basically, my life would be easier if I floated around in a bubble, unable to catch infections and safe from anything the sun.

Wednesday, 27 April 2011

Every Day Like The Last

The theatre; how exciting. Well, not really..sorry.
Days in hospital seem to follow the same routine. Arrive/wake up. Wait. Wait some more. See a doctor. Wait. Get whatever treatment I'm due. WAIT WAIT WAIT. The worst day was yesterday. I was due to get a new line in, which means I'd be in surgery. Surgery means fasting from midnight the night before. After an entire day of waiting and being told I may not even get seen at all, I was taken at 8. 27 hours of fasting. It was painful. I could honestly, never in one million years be anorexic. It makes you so angry and short tempered and lethargic not being able to eat or drink. Absolute nightmare. Every time my door opened I'd catch sight of the 'Nil by Mouth' sign and just WANT food even more. Meal times stank out the hospital of food. FOOD FOOD FOOD. I eventually got back from surgery at 11pm so all I ate yesterday was toast. Safe to say I enjoyed my food today though.
There's only so much daytime TV you can watch, only so much facebook you can be kept amused with, it's just SO boring. Sleeping seems to play a large part in my life though, even just sitting doing nothing is absolutely shattering. Waiting, and moaning about waiting just kills. When someone knocks on my door, I actually get excited in case it's someone exciting (which, really is a lot to expect, it's usually someone just looking for my folder) So if anyone has any suggestions on how to keep amused in boring times, they'd be highly appreciated!

This just sort of sums it up, my facial expression- bored. the general look of things- boring. Don't get me wrong, it's fine, but you get to the end of the day, and realise that you haven't done or achieved anything all day and only actually left your bed to go to the toilet and back. Which sums up my day today perfectly. One of the times i ventured to the toilet, I noticed that my hair/fluff is growing. It's GROWING. It's meant to fall out, so I'm going to have to get Tony the lovely nurse to run the clippers through it again. When I came home and my dad told my brother he was getting his hair cut tomorrow, and I say "ooh so am i! Tony's gonna do it, it's getting too long" both my brother's and dad burst into hysterical laughter that I think my hair is too long. But it is! It's amazing how quickly you get used to seeing yourself bald. Or nearing-bald as I am. But I constantly find myself stroking my head. It's so comforting and soft. Like a fluffy baby duck. Which brings me to my next point, I have a blog written out in my head, about the whole hair thing and how it all happens. Which would really require uploading a photo of myself bald. But I am NO WAY ballsy enough unleash bald Gibson to public peepers. So it'll have to wait really. So for now, strictly all photos avec hair.
See, hair (:

Everytime a nurse/doctor/consultant sees you before or after a weekend, they'll ask you if you did/are doing anything exciting at the weekend. So of course I could answer that with a yes, for the first time today by telling them about my zoo experience and getting in the papers etc from last weekend. And that i have one of my girl's eighteenth's tomorrow followed by the Royal Wedding on Friday and hopefully something mildly amusing for the weekend. But this is all planned around my hospital times. Which is such a 'mare. I'm in over the weekend. THE WEEKEND. Time of rest. No? Okay, looks like I'm on chemo over the weekend. So unfair. HELLO, I'M FIFTEEN. IT MAY NOT SEEM LIKE IT BUT I DO HAVE A SOCIAL LIFE. Well, not so much anymore, actually not at all anymore. It's even got to the stage where I've stopped getting invited places because everyone just presumes I won't be able to go, which hurts. Even if I couldn't go, which i maybe could, it's still nice to be invited, so you know people haven't forgotten about you and they still want your presence. ..Obviously not. Awkk. But still. I don't wanna be stuck in hospital. So make the most of your lives people, appreciate your freedom, and your friends and your nights out. Because now, and for the next nine months I shall be deprived of such and spend a lot, too much time looking through you're photos and longing to have a normal life. As sad as that sounds..

Monday, 25 April 2011

Something Good Can Happen

Many people go through life with a naive state of mind about the negative things. [Cue: The Kooks-Naive.] They often think 'oh it won't happen to me, I'm okay' or 'I won't be that one in however many' but you never know. I was always very naive about skin damage. As a child and teenager I'm pretty well travelled I guess, and every time I've had the chat of 'put suncream on, the risks of skin cancer..' BLAH BLAH BLAH. It became a ringing in my ears. I've always thought 'ouch, I'm burnt. But OH WELL it'll fade into a brill tan. Woop!' I'd also watch all sorts of disease-charity ad's on TV and think 'that's such a shame, poor people' and never really do anything about it. Give the occasional donation to various charities etc. But nothing major.  You don't really realise how much it really helps.  It just sort of hits you when you realise that, suddenly these charities are helping you whilst all along you don't really think twice. I'm newly diagnosed and have already majorly benefitted from various charities. My brother, Cameron has always been involved in charity through school (he even has a hoodie. BOOM.) and he's just set up a fundraising campaign for Teenage Cancer Trust and will be raising money to help make cancer sufferers' lives a lot better. I think it's an amazing thing he's doing and would appreciate any donations at all. You can get further information at:

Anyway, although I'd much rather have my old life back and never have ever become ill and have this happen to me, I try not to think 'why me?' and 'what if..' too much, although of course I have thought, 'why me of all people?' before, but it just doesn't help. There are good sides to it, for example; The Make a Wish Foundation offer sufferers of various diseases a wish, it could be anything from an iPad to a weekend in London and meeting various celebrities. Of course, if I were to ask anyone 'would you rather suffer from cancer and meet Cheryl Cole, or lead a normal life?' they'd probably respond with the latter. But if you're already diagnosed, something like that would really lift your spirits and make you feel better about everything. Dame Ellen MacArthur is also very involved in charity work for cancer and has her own charities. Each summer she runs a yachting holiday where her and her crews take young people sailing for a week on a yacht. Ellen MacArthur visited TCT in Sick Kids last month and I was lucky enough to chat to her, she said that the holidays are brilliant fun and really help people meet others like them. Another I've heard of is the Find Your Sense of Tumour conferences. This annual four day conference gathers people who have or have had cancer from all over Europe and gives them a chance to meet others and share experiences. There are various activities and guest speakers with entertainment in the evenings. Meeting people who understand what you're going through can really boost your self-esteem and make you feel better and even understand things more. I've recently spoken to a friend of a friend who was actually at the same school as me who suffered non-Hodgkins Lymphoma which is similar to my disease but less common and more tricky to treat, and hearing about her experiences has helped me quite a lot. Obviously, I'm quite early on in my treatment so I've not yet experienced many of these things, but at some point in the future I'm sure I will.

As you can see from this (edited) picture, I get a bit flushed whilst hooked up to chemo (I also had to crop out my beautiful drip with my line coming from under my t-shirt.) And when I say 'a bit flushed' I really mean, my face turns BRIGHT purple or red. It's beautiful, really. When I get about..three minutes of warning that press are here and I'm in hospital, obviously having made no effort. SHOWELL. So yeah, that's a picture of (one of) my wonderful consultant(s) and Dame Ellen MacArthur. So basically whilst I'm receiving chemo, I'm a bright red, shiny, too-tall-for-her-bed, sleeping lump of Lymphoma. Brill isn't it?! But it's a hospital, you can get away with that. In saying that, you could probably come into hospital with a foaming mouth, green skin and eight arms and they'd not even take a second look. Normal patient yeah? Don't be silly, there isn't much in hospital that's normal, but it's cool, you get used to it! My ward is currently half decorated in accordance to the Royal Wedding with the other half full of spring chickens and Easter eggs. I s'pose that's not too un-normal. It's just been Easter...and the wedding's next week, but still. It's when you find the kitchen full of Will and Kate mugs with a Will and Kate cake for dessert and coordinating napkins and soft toys on the beds, then things begin to get weird and you start getting nightmares where every man you see is Will and woman Kate. Bring in the Will and Kate version of Barbie and Ken. (or is that Heidi and Spencer Pratt? HAW HAW HAW)

   It was funny, the other day when my mum asked if needing my line replaced would delay chemo, my consultant replied with 'no, we have nurses who can Laura's chemo over the weekend [Royal Wedding weekend] I mean, it's not my fault Will and Kate are getting married next weekend' We laughed, even though you will all be sitting there with completely straight faces, you know that awkward moment when you say 'lol' to someone and you're sitting there almost asleep, this is one of them, yeah, soz.

Anyway, the lack of excitement and imagination in today's blog is mainly due to the lack of excitement and imagination in me along with the lack of..well, everything else. My. Brain. Is. Mush.

Saturday, 23 April 2011

Hopping Mad Easter Bantre

So today, after being stuck in the hospital for an entire week, I had plans to go to the Zoo. I was absolutely buzzing, haven't been properly since childhood (I went last May with my French exchange but we were too involved in our banter to pay any attention to the animals!) So after making a joke to my dad the other day about him buying a bunny onesie and delivering eggs to all the neighbours for Easter, his partner and him bought me and his partner's girls the bunny onesies as an Easter gift. (they are BRILL!) My brother also got a kiddies duck/spring chicken hooded blanket. We decided it would be an absolute hilarity to wear them to the Zoo (despite the pouring rain) So off we hopped on our Easter adventure. Arrived at the Zoo and went to the ticket desk where the Zoo manager approached us saying that we weren't allowed in due to our inappropriate attire that would scare and upset the animals and cause them 'psychological damage' OH PUH-LEASE. There's people with face paint and masks and we weren't allowed in wearing bunny costumes which were pretty plain in grey and white! So we headed along to Lazerquest hoping to have a wee shoot, but they were full. So we hopped back home where we ended up getting phone calls and e-mails from various news sites and newspapers. You can check it out here: 
So I've had a pretty interesting day, the excitement actually beat going to the Zoo anyway. YEAH IN YO' ANIMALLY FACES.  ...guess the Zoo aren't keen on licking rabbits either.

Anyway, two days free from hospital in the comfort of my own home are good no matter what. Normal meal times (last night's dinner consisted of a take away Indian at 9pm, with home cooked rice, because I'm not allowed to eat reheated food due to the risk of germs), my own bed with a duvet, and the space. It's odd, but you actually miss just walking from room to room. I also had a preeetty good shower this morning. Although I had no idea what to do. I have no hair (well, not enough to wash) and soap irritates my newly sensitive skin. So I just sort of had to stand under the water. Nevertheless, it was relaxing! And as lovely as my nurses are, it's such a relief to be left alone and not have people come and disturb you to do your ob's every half hour or ask what you wanted off the trolly or hook you up to infusions. It may only be two days, but you need to learn to make the most of every day when you're in my position. Honestly, you begin to appreciate everything and you miss the smallest and oddest things (obviously as well as the obvious things) Examples include: being able to go out, even just down to the shops, without the risk of catching an infection, having a social life of any kind (unless my neutrafills are up), generally going out and wearing proper clothes and school. Yes, I admit it, I miss school.

Speaking of school. My school has decided to do breakfast before the first lesson of the day. Just as I become unable to go to school BAM there's bacon rolls and hot chocolate before lessons. Very VERY gutted I'm missing this. So I told my mum, and she made me a bacon sandwich the next morning in hospital, honestly, this is SUCH a treat after constant toast or Weetabix for breakfast day after day. It's not so much the school work I miss though, it's seeing my friends every day. I literally have thee most amazing girls at school and there are no words to describe how much I miss them every single day, having such fun at breaks and lunch times, honestly, if anyone else was there they'd call the nearest mental institution! I do see them though, but going from seeing them every day to seeing them once every week or two, it's seriously hard. So this is a shout out to my girliess, you know who you are ladiezz. I love youuuu klassy ladiez. 

Thursday, 21 April 2011

Blame It On The Chemo.

My illness has become my new excuse for everything. For example;
"Laura, help me cut the grass?" "Dad, I'm ill."
"Mum, whats 7+3" "Has the chemo destroyed your braincells too?" "Yes."
My parent's aren't hugely keen. It's just an excuse to be lazy. HELLO, CANCER OVER HERE. But no, just because you're ill doesn't mean people do what you say and you get what you want, not at all. But of course people will generally be nicer and gentler around you, and sometimes that's just what you need. But you can't become a little brat, you just need to be treated normally. (this doesn't apply to you, mum and dad.)
I'm not kidding with the second one though, my brain has literally turned to jelly, guess that'll be the chemo brain kicking in then eh? But I don't do it seriously, just jokingly. Although many of my sentences start off with "Mum, can you..." Usually ending in "Mum, can you get me ______ from the kitchen?" Which wouldn't happen if I was allowed in the kitchen. Silly health and safety. I mean, c'mon, I'm not going to drown myself refilling my water jug, I'm not that clumsy.

Although, one of the side rails of my bed is up at the moment, not necessarily in case i fall out, mainly to haul myself into a seated position in bed, where I have spent the entire day watching music channels. I've probably quadrupled the number of music videos I've ever seen today. The video for 'On the Floor' has probably been on about 4 times in the past hour and 'Party Rock Anthem' about 8. My nurse, Kayleigh has actually said that every time she hears the song she thinks of me because every time she's in my room it's playing! After pointing out to my mum that J-Lo is actually only 4 years younger than her, my mum decided that actually, they were long lost sisters and they looked just alike. She then refused to go and get my dose of Petits Filous until I agreed with her. So here I am, on public internet, announcing that actually, my mother is the spitting image of the beautiful Jennifer Lopez.
Bruno Mars' new song 'The Lazy Song' really describes my life right now. I mean, (obviously, if you cancel out the cancer...and the amazing sex bit doesn't really apply) but it's describing my constant mood. If you swap the dancing monkeys (amazing, I know) for a baby ducks, it really is just the Life of Gibson. I say ducks because, with my hair (if you could call it that) in it's current state (my wonderful play nurse Helen took the clippers to it on Monday, I now have like..fuzz), I feel I look like a baby duck. Very seasonal of me, i know. So a baby duck with J-Lo as it's mother. Odd huh?

Another TV comment, I've recently noticed the interesting song choice that some adverts seem to be rocking recently. For example, the song in the KFC advert, not only is it completely irrelevant and unrealistic- (who has a full on neighbourhood BBQ with KFC?! Pfft cheapskates) is one you'd expect to find in an advert for starving children in Africa or a Cancer Research advert. I'm pretty sure the current Cancer Research adverts are actually more cheery!

Anyway, on a completely different note, I met the girl who was staying in the room next door to me last night. Her name is Stacey and she is amazing. She went through a tough three years of treatment for Leukaemia which finished in June and as a result of the steroids she was taking as part of the chemo, her hip completely crumbled and she's needing a hip replacement and compression in the other. It just shows you that even when you're given the all clear, the cancer stays with you for the rest of your life, even in the way that you'll look at life differently and appreciate the little things in life, maybe more than someone who's not gone through what we do. There's only a couple of possible side affects of my cancer that scare me a little. The first is that having Lymphoma increases your chances of getting Leukaemia, which would be an absolute nightmare! (fingers and toes crossed that one skips me!) and the other is due to the 80% chance that I'll need Radiotherapy after my chemo, there's a chance I could become infertile. Which is a fear many women have. I got a strip of eggs removed to be preserved as part of a trial, so I can still have kids if I want them, which is such a relief. Stacey made the point that when people talk about cancer, it's a scary word, and they assume it's all sick people and ending in death. No one really thinks about the survivors. (If anyone's wanting a real insight to chemo/general cancer, then I do not recommend you watch My Sister's Keeper.) Of course, it can be and is horrible. I wouldn't wish it upon anyone in a zillion years. But, I'm now a sixth of my way through my treatment (AWOOO) and not once have I been sick or had that 'I'd rather be dead' thought. Yeah, I've felt really horrible and just wanted to snuggle up in bed and stay there all day, but it's no where near as bad as I'd imagined. But that's me and the way my body is dealing with it, I'm sure other people and other cancer's are very different.

I'd like to apologise, firstly for the state of my blog tonight. I had fully written one which I was pleased with and just before publishing, I stupidly deleted it, thinking I was deleting a picture. So I became grumpy and forgot what I'd written. And secondly for my impersonal, boring pictures. The only pictures I'd taken today were of me before theatre, and since I hasn't written about theatre, thought they'd be irrelevant and pointless. So instead I've blessed you with a picture of a duck and the only picture of My Sister's Keeper where there's smiles. HIP HIP HORRAY. Believe me, I smile a lot more, my nurses actually think I smile too much. There is no such thing.

PS. 'Every day, they been shufflin'. Monday shuffle. Tuesday shuffle. Everybody. The whole world. Everything. It'll get in yo' bones.' too right it gets in you bones, sure is in my bones.

So this is the part where I'd be really gay and say 'you know you love me. xoxo gosspigirl.' but I decided against it to save my social image. PFFT social is a word thrown out my dictionary.

xoxo giibsongirl HAWHAW.

Wednesday, 20 April 2011

Life in Bed.

Breakfast in bed kind of loses it's wonderful glory when, in hospital, you get breakfast, lunch and dinner in bed..and everything in between. It's lucky I get a long bed in my room, in the main ward I'm like Goldy Locks in Baby Bear's bed with my feet hanging off the edge. The nurses find it hilarious. I guess that's what I get for being treated in Sick Kids. I guess I'm either no longer a kid or just too tall to be a kid.

More Downsides to Kids Wards:
Of course there's the screaming, moaning, crying kids all day everywhere.
Kids staring at you because you're too old.
The constant blaring CBeebies programmes.
Having to see young kids on drips (so sad, they're so brave)
Meal times. Lunch at 12 and dinner at 5, no thanks.

And Some More Upsides:
2:30 snack time HOLLA.
As bad as it is, the kiddies food.
The complimentary colouring books and various other toys.
The stickers after scans (when you get them- rarely in my case)
The massage and relax therapy nurse.
I get into TCT which makes all the difference.

Although, with the TCT Unit, there's only two rooms, and obviously more than two teenagers with cancer who are treated here, so things get a little awkward. Like last week I had to spend two days in a room on the main ward because both rooms were full, which wasn't too bad but didn't quite match TCT. Then yesterday, I was told I'd need to stay in for a while because I have an infection in my portacath (which is basically a plastic port underneath my skin on my right hand side with a line going straight into my central vein- it's basically instead of them having to stick a needle into me every time they give me chemo.) So one guy who was in TCT got chucked out into the main ward (but he's only 12 so I get priority MATE) Oh my..if looks could kill.

This is the view from my bed yesterday. Pretty isn't it, with the treasure chest and other various wall decor. Then there's the treatment room to the left which is basically where you get your grippers (the needles and tubes that go into your portacath) put in/some chemo too.

On another note, I'm completely up to date with the life of the Kardashian clan and I plan to teach myself the Party Rock Anthem shuffle in the near future. You really are limited to what you can do when stuck in hospital for any length of time. I often find myself just sitting. Like, literally just sitting on my bed staring into space with a completely blank mind. It's quite sad really. Although my mum sits with me for the majority of the day so we have our fair share of bantre. She has this basketball game on her phone which has become a recent addiction, the look of concentration on her face is honestly priceless.

I also have consultants who fight over me. Honestly it's brilliant. Most patients only have one consultant but I get two. Simply because one (AE) likes dealing with teenagers and Lymphoma and then there's the other (HW) who is the head of Lymphoma in Europe and he also has an interest in teen fertility, making me the perfect patient for both. So they both deal with my case. It's funny though because there's a whiteboard in the ward saying who's in the ward and where they are, and who their consultant is. So yesterday it was AE and then after HW came in to chat to us, it miraculously changed to HW. So mum and I have a suspicion that whenever it's up as HW, AE will come along, rub it out, and write AE next to my name, so then when HW sees its up as AE, he'll change it to HW. SNEAKY. They're both absolutely lovely though so I'm quite happy.

This is yet another blog post that no one will take any interest in. If there's anything that you want to know/want me to write about please let me know, my imagination doesn't stretch as far as my tumours do.

Sunday, 17 April 2011

Don't Lick The Rabbit

I've been given so many 'do's and don't's' (is that how you write it?) in the past month it's hard to remember all of them, but they're mostly 'if you can avoid it' so really, i can. But the one 'absolute no' i've been given is not to lick my rabbit or my brothers. I kid you not. The conversation with the nurse actually included the sentence 'Just don't lick your rabbit.' I suppose its general hygiene and she works in a children's hospital but  still..licking a rabbit..I'll pass. Although my rabbit is cool. She just kinda hops around the house and gets your attention by nudging your ankle with her nose..or climbing all over you whilst your watching TV. But she is amazing. This is MJ by the way, I don't know why..I think because of Mary-Jane in Spiderman. My little brother named her. She thinks she's a dog. Standard rabbit activity, huh?

Being treated in a children's hospital is fun. My mum had to make the decision on the phone between Sick Kids and the Western so she chose Sick Kids, which was the best decision. There are major benefits like; I had a Bone Marrow sample under general anasthetic, but in the Western I would have been awake (which I'm told is almost not worth living for, its that painful) and whilst i get Chemo i get three different anti-sickness drugs, which i wouldn't get at the Western. But there's other benefits like..all the rooms and wards are decorated with Disney characters, Ward 2 (Oncology and Haemotology (where I am)) had an 'underwater' theme which is beyond exciting. Even some of the windows have creatures on them.

The one thing though, that reaaally gets to me, is the fact that the doctors and nurses think I'm too old to want a sticker after an x-ray or a certificate after being in theatre. In the space of two days, I had two MRI scans, 4 CT scans, 8 X-Rays and a PET scan and did I get a sticker? No. My mum actually had to ask for a sticker for me on the last x-ray. I was then in theatre twice and only got a certificate the first time. Then a girl who was only one year younger than me (although she looked, and acted about 7) got a sticker for simply chatting to the dentist, I CHATTED TO THE DENTIST TOO. There was one day though, I was in the main ward in surgery and a nurse came round with her arms full of 'Grumpy' teddies from Snow White and the Seven Dwarves that were donated by Disney. She went round offering them to all the kids in the ward, and I was thinking 'I swear, if she doesn't offer me one...' but luckily she did. Grumpy now comes to hospital with me every time I stay over.

Basically the moral of the post, is I am a child at heart. Oh..and don't lick your pets.

Saturday, 16 April 2011

The Beginning

So after i found and was inspired by sophiefeelsbetter's blog, i decided i was going to start a blog. I thought it would be a fun way to share my experiences going through my Cancer and I've decided i may as well be open about it.

Cancer is a big word. It's scary. Everyone knows it, but little about it. So I'll tell you about my Cancer. I have what's called Stage Four Hodgkins Lymphoma. Its a cancer originating from white blood cells called lymphocytes and is a cancer of the lymph tissue which can be found in lymph nodes, spleen, liver, bone marrow etc. The 'stage four' part basically means that I have the worst case and that it has spread everywhere it possibly can. The treatment for it is six cycles of Chemotherapy, then Radiotherapy and should last 6-9 months. And yes, there are side affects, some of which i'm sure your aware (hello baldie!)

The first thing I really want to talk about, though, is the support. The support I've had from my friends and family is unreal. (the amount of flowers and chocolate I've been given is too!) But honestly, I could not ask for better people in my life. But it's also the support from charities. I get treated in Sick Kids and when I'm in I stay in TCT which is the Teenage Cancer Ward funded by Teenage Cancer Trust. The difference it makes is unreal, it's our own quiet space and the rooms are kitted out with big TVs and there's a lounge with an XBox, Wii, PS3 and loads of movies. TCT also fund for our wigs, they're done by the wonderful Charlie Miller (so you can imagine how amazing they are) and that makes a huge difference. Another charity I'd like to mention is It's Good 2 Give! It was set up by a friend of my mum's and they provide various snacks for the ward I stay in (hospital food isn't great) and generally the support that all cancer charities offer is incredible!

When i was first told i had cancer,  i was speechless. There was honestly nothing I could think to say. So I just cried. But I have a very positive attitude towards it; there's nothing i can do about it so why dwell on it. So essentially, this blog is my diary, but i thought i'd share it. If anyone cares...probably not.